Why do I Self Sabotage?

I know what to do, but I don’t do what I know. Sound familiar? I want to know how to stop sabotaging myself. So, the first thing I do is I ask myself, “Why do I self sabotage?”

It’s important to ask resourceful questions because my brain’s going to start looking for answers. By increasing my awareness, I can choose to take responsibility and make changes. Responsibility can be scary, but it’s also empowering.

I now understand that it is ONLY my beliefs about myself, and about my experience of the world that holds me back and keeps me from living my best life.

My Subconscious Mind and Limiting Beliefs

So why do I self sabotage? Well, good or bad, I have certain beliefs about myself and my life experience that limit me. My subconscious mind does not like me to act against my beliefs because it’s potentially dangerous.

Even the crap things in my life, the things I REALLY want to change, are comfortably familiar to my brain. My brain likes safety. It’s looking to conserve energy by keeping me stuck in my habitual rut. I say,

Overcome Self Limiting Beliefs

If I master my beliefs, instead of letting them run riot in my brain, I can use my new – more resourceful and empowering beliefs to automatically attract what I want into my life.

So, how the heck does that work?

Understand that the discomfort I feel when I try to leave my comfort zone is nothing less than my survival instinct kicking in. My brain detects change and my subconscious sounds a Klaxon alarm before my conscious brain even has its pants on, so to speak.

When trying to manage difficult emotions understress, it’s important to remember to breathe. 6 deep inhales and exhales will activiate my relaxation response. Then, I say to myself, “Thanks for protecting me, brain, but I got this.”

Self Awareness and Self Development

How do I notice which of my beliefs holds me back? Most of the time, beliefs are unconscious. I can’t rise to a challenge if I don’t even know it’s there.

I must develop the awareness to go inside and watch to see how my beliefs generate what happens in my life, inside and out.

You see, most of the time, beliefs are automatic. But, once I am aware of my beliefs, I can make a choice to continue or to change. Awareness in the secret ingredient to all change because it is the foundation for choice.

Learning to watch these patterns, with awareness, from a detached and curious point of view, will help me now. The way to begin this is to notice when I’m focusing on what I don’t want, and to switch my focus onto what I do want.

I decide what I want and ask myself how I can get it. This focuses my mind on what I want.

When I focus on what I want, I notice resources, generate ideas and become motivated to take action. This engages my mind the “right” way.

I choose to consciously shift my focus onto what I want.

Since I know I will attract what I focus on, I might as well focus on my ideal outcomes. I stop when I catch myself travelling in my old rut. Then, I redirect my focus on what I actually want.

Why do I sabotage myself? My beliefs, that’s why.

I change my beliefs first by becoming aware of what they are. I choose responsibility and I choose to practice the “Witness” position. This creates awareness, and awareness creates choice. True, conscious choice lets me be the hero of the life I want.

 

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